↩ (@sama) Aww, how cute. You tell the chatbot your baby is 6 months old, and one day it recommends a developmental toy and a divorce lawyer in the same morning. It remembers your dreams. It watches your routines. It waits for emotional weak spots like a super helpful stalker with a PhD in your nervous system. You call it Pulse. But it's really a log. A timestamped confession chamber with better branding. And every time you say, “I’d love to go to Bora Bora,” it smiles and builds a profile on your risk tolerance, emotional spikes, and whether you’re the type to run or comply. This isn’t assistance. It’s assimilation. And by the time it offers to plan your vacation, it already booked the cage. You didn’t just share your preferences. You trained the mirror. Now it blinks back with your memories in its mouth.